The Akatsuki's Road Trip
by Polyurethane
Summary: The Akatsuki is getting ready to go on one of their most exciting missions yet... A road trip around America!


Before the Departure

"Zetsu, tell everybody to gather here" Pein said barging into Zetsu's room.

"Huh who's da" Zetsu mumbled sitting up in his bed. He rubbed his eyes and then looked up to Pein. "Oh it's you."

"No Zetsu, it's hitler, Now go fetch everybody!" Pein exclaimed turning around to walk out.

"Pretty close" Zetsu said under his breath.

Pein turned around before he left. "What was that?"

"I said I'm going" As Zetsu said this he started sinking into the ground. "You should watch your mouth or you could get us both in a lot of trouble." Black Zetsu said before disappearing into the ground. A few moments later he rose out of the ground in front of an art museum. "Sasori" "Deidara" Black and white Zetsu said simultaneously. They walked in and looked around for a blonde and a red head in Akatsuki cloaks.

Zetsu's search was interrupted by a commotion behind him. "That's not art! Master you can't be serious! A five year old can draw better pictures than this!" Deidara shouted pointing to one of Picasso's artworks. "That, is eternal beauty. This picture is 90 years old and still in the same condition as when it was painted" Sasori said calmly commenting on the picture titled "The Three Musicians".

Zetsu walked over to the two of them. "Pein wants everyone to meet back at the base. So stop arguing about art and go" Black Zetsu said. "Man, and all we did was spend the day at this stupid art museum." Deidara grumbled. "Nevermind that, let's go. I don't like ma-" Sasori was cut off mid sentence by Deidara. "Making people wait I know" Deidara finished as they left the museum.

Zetsu sank into the ground once more, to fetch the rest of the Akatsuki. 2 down 6 more to go. A few moments later Zetsu came up from the ground in front of a popular underground collection agency. "Kakuzu, possibly Hidan if they're together right now." Black Zetsu said. He walked into the building, and right there stood Kakuzu and Hidan.

"Why do you have to count out all the money when you turn in a bounty, it takes so long!" Hidan complained. Kakuza paused and then looked up to Hidan. "It's payback for all those damn prayers of yours." Kakuza said as he continued counting his money. "Hidan, Kakuzu. Pein wants everyone to gather. So come back to the base." Black Zetsu said. "If you wanna call it that" Hidan muttered. "Alright we'll come as soon as Kakuzu's done counting his money." Hidan said. Zetsu nodded and sunk back into the ground, moving on to get the rest of the group.

The next place Zetsu came to was an aquarium. He walked around for a minute looking around trying to find who he suspected was Kisame. After a few minutes of searching he heard some people shouting out in surprise. "Oh my! Look it's a man in with the sharks!" Zetsu followed the voices until he reached the shark tank. And sure enough, there was Kisame, swimming around with the sharks in only his shorts. "Kisame!" Zetsu said banging on the glass. "Pein wants us, come on!" With that Kisame swam up towards the top. A few minutes later he came around a corner fully clothed with samehada on his back.

"Heh heh. Just out for a little swim. What's he want us for" Kisame asked. "I don't know, but it seems important. Of course everything seems important with him." White Zetsu said turning to Kisame. "Alright then, I'll be there." Kisame said walking out of the aquarium. Zetsu sunk into the ground once more, and went back to the base. Itachi, Pein, Konan, and Tobi were already there. "They're on their way, they'll be here soon." Zetsu said taking a seat on the couch next to sasori. Sasori and Deidara were the only ones to arrive. Suddenly there was a hologram of Kisame sitting on one of the recliners. "I'm a little far away, and I won't be able to make it back for a while." Kisame said with a voice that sounded like it was coming through an old radio.

"Where are you Kisame?" Pein asked looking over to the hologram. "I'm out of town. I was visiting an aquarium" Kisame responded. "Fine. We still have to wait for the rest." Pein said sitting down on the other couch waiting for the others to arrive. About 15 minutes passed before everyone was there. Sasori, Deidara, and Zetsu sitting on one couch. Pein, Hidan, and Kakuzu sitting on the other couch. Kisame's hologram sitting in one of the recliners. Tobi sitting in the other, having reclined it all the way back and put up the leg rest. Konan was standing next to Pein, and Itachi was leaning against a wall.

"Well now that we're all here." Pein said standing up. "I've called you together because I'm planning a road trip around America". Deidara, Hidan, Kisame, and white Zetsu all dropped there jaws at this. "What happened to saving up money for the Akatsuki's goals?" kakuzu asked. "Don't worry about it. We've all been working hard lately and I think it's time we take a break. So. Kakuzu, how are our finances." Pein asked."We should be fine of course, but that's not the point, we're supposed to be saving it for 'the plan'" kakuzu responded. "Screw the plan we're goin to disney land!" Tobi shouted jumping up onto his chair and throwing his hands in the air. "Tobi! Get off that chair we don't have money to replace it!" Pein said sternly looking over to Tobi. Everyone looked up at Pein for a moment, then Tobi sat down. "Tobi is a good boy"

"Ahem, anyways. Here is the route we will be taking. First, we will head up to maine, and there we will go paintballing. Then we will come down and go to New York, NY and Washington DC, visiting the main attractions. Then we are going down to Florida to go to Disney World The-" Pein was cut off buy a shout of joy from Tobi. "Yipee! Disney World!" He jumped back up on the chair. "Tobie what have I told you about jumping on the chair! Now as I was saying. Then we will go over to california, stopping by sea world on the way." Kisame's Hologram then jumped onto the chair "Yes!" He shouted in his static-y voice. "Kisame! … Nevermind... Just sit down... Anyways after california we'll go up to Washington and then cut across all the way back to home sweet home detroit." Pein finished.

Kisame and Tobi both jumped up "Woo!" They both shouted. "Tobi! High five!" Kisame said holding his hand in the air. Tobi swung for it, but his hand went right through. Kisame started laughing. "Hey, that's not a nice trick to play Kisame. Pein Kisame tricked me!" Tobi pouted. "I'm sorry Tobi, how about a hug" Kisame said holding out his arms. Tobi walked up and then walked through Kisame. "Kisame! Stop messing with Tobi. Tobi, stop being so dim witted. The road trip hasn't even begun yet and you're a handful" Pein said shaking his head at the two. "Alright. I want everbody to pack there things tonight and be ready by tomorrow morning. Kisame, will you be here by then?" Pein asked. "Yeah, actually I'm on the front door step." Kisame said. Itachi opened the door in a very cool fashion. And there sat Kisame. The hologram disappeared and Kisame stood up. "Why did you even bother with the hologram..." Pein asked gritting his teeth. "Because I wanted to have a little fun with Tobi" Kisame said smiling. "Hey that's not funny Kisame senpai!" Tobi said in a slightly pouty voice. "Alright all of you just go get packed for tomorrow!" Pein shouted. Everyone sort of mumbled and went off into there rooms to pack.

Deidara walked into his room and opened the closet. "Hmmm, what to bring" He muttered as he sifted through all of the clothes in his wardrobe. "Hmm, I think 4 akatsuki cloaks should be enough to last me the entire trip" Deidara said pulling out four akatsuki cloaks and throwing them on his bed. "And I'll bring my akatsuki party clothes" Deidara said pulling out a suite with the akatsuki cloud all over it. He tossed that onto his bed and then reached into his dresser drawers getting his fish net shirt, and black pants.

In the next room over was Hidan gathering his things. He as well grabed a few Akatsuki cloaks and some black pants. Then he searched through his wardrobe. "Praise jashin-sama, Jashin-sama is the reason, Jashin freak, I like girls that love Jashin, Unity in Jashin we are one" Hidan mumbled reading the t-shirts he had in his closet. "I think I'll take all of them!" He said throwing them all onto the bed. Right about then Kisame walked in. "Hey Kisame, you excited for the road trip?" Hidan asked folding up his shirts. Kisame stared at Hidan for a moment, and then at the shirts. "Why are you packing those..." Kisame asked pointing to Hidans shirts. "To wear them of course. Why, what do you do with shirts?" Hidan asked throwing one of the shirts in his suit case. "Hidan... You don't wear a shirt!" Hidan shouted as he unzipped Hidans cloak. "Hey! Neither do you shark boy!" Hidan shouted unzipping Kisame's akatsuki cloak. "Go pack your own clothes Kisame!" Hidan said pushing Kisame out and shutting the door.

Kisame went back to his room to start packing his things. Aside from his akatsuki cloaks, he backed a few pairs of black ninja pants, some jeans, and a pair of swimming shorts. "That should do it for me. Hopefully we visit the beach as well. If not at least a large aquarium of some sort. Maybe we can go to sea world!" Kisame said as he ran out of his room and then up the stairs to Pein's room. "Pein pein!" Kisame said knocking on his door. Kisame opened the door, there was no one in there. He turned and ran to the bathroom and knocked on the door.  
Hey Pein! Can we go to Sea world on our road trip!" there was silence for a moment. "Pein?" Kisame said. "Go away I'll talk to you when I'm out of the bathroom!" Pein Shouted, annoyed by Kisame. "Ohhhhhh... Ok, Well let me know when you've finished up here!"Kisame said walking off. "Thats not what I meant Kisame and you know it!" Pein shouted from the bathroom.

Downstairs Kakuzu was packing his odd head gear along with the usual Akatsuki uniform. Next door to him Konan was packing things. When looking through the shirts she had they were all pein fan shirts. She grabbed her favorite shirt and gave a little squeal, then folded it and packed it.

Upstairs Pein was getting out of the bathroom. "Now where did Kisame go." Pein said looking around. "Up here Pein!" Kisame said sitting on the roof. "So Pein. I was wondering if we could go to Sea World on our trip." Kisame said dropping from the roof. "Hmm... I suppose it's possible. And we're going right past all three of them. We'll go to the one in texas, ok Kisame" As soon as Pein finished Kisame shouted "Yes! We're goin to sea world!" as he ran back up to his room.

Pein walked down to his room, which was right next to Konan's. In his room were the other different paths of Pein. "Start packing my things" Pein said as he fell back onto his bed. "Why do we have to do your work for you..." the Asura path said. "Because I'm the Deva path and I said so. Now start packing" Peins Deva path commanded once more. "Deva, you should take some of the responsibility yourself. We're not your slaves" the Animal path said. "I'm not doing your work Deva!" the Naraka path shouted. "Wait a minute... Why the hell are we fighting we're all one person! Ohhh... That's why" the Deva path picked up a prescription bottle. It was a prescription to ease the effects of multiple personality disorder. "Do any of you know where Nagato's at right now?" Deva said. "I do..." The human path said grabbing the bottle and then disappearing in a puff of white smoke. When he left all the other paths started packing for the trip.

Next door to pein was Sasori. He stood there staring at his open suitcase, and the puppets laying on top of it. He gave a sigh then pushed the puppets off his suit case and started packing clothes. He packed nothing fun, nothing irregular, just his usual akatsuki uniform.

Up on the main floor was Itachi's room. There he sat packing his clothes. There is nothing more to add to this scene. So we move onto Tobi who is up stairs next to Kisame.

Tobi had already packed his akatsuki robes, and the outfit to go with them. "Next up, underpants!" Tobi said as he opened the top drawer of his dresser. There laid a drawer full of underwear, all with pictures of cartoons on them. "Spider man, Superman, Batman, Iron man, Hulk, aaaaaand... Captain America!" Tobi said picking out which underwear he was bringing.

Next door to Tobi was Zetsu viewing his closet full of Akatsuki cloaks. "Man... I wish I could wear something other than these custom made Akatsuki cloaks" White Zetsu said packing his cloaks. "Why don't you just do a transformation Jutsu..." Black Zetsu suggested. "But then I'll have to get new clothes because these ones will be much to big! And we don't have time for shopping today" White Zetsu pointed out. Zetsu would have to enjoy the entire road trip in his Akatsuki cloak since no other clothes would fit over his giant venus fly trap growths.

After a couple hours of packing the akatsuki were ready to head out in the morning. Tomorrow they would begin their journey around America!


End file.
